St. Patrick's Day is about letting loose in all the right ways. One wrong way to let loose is to pinch elderly folks who aren't wearing green. I saw someone do that. It was not well received. Another way to let loose incorrectly is to wear green underwear that has the support of a bouncy castle. March 17th involves a lot of walking, dancing, and tripping. You're going to want the sack support of our St. Patrick's day underwear to cradle your shamROCKS all nice like. And to be clear, shamrock boxers are not just for St. Paddy's. If you're from Ireland, you might as well sport our St. Patrick's Day boxers daily.
Show your love of Ireland with St. Patrick's Day Boxers
Have you ever been to Ireland? Me neither, but you better believe that on St. Patrick’s Day I’m going to pretend like my blood runs green, my strongest Irish accent will burst forth and I’ll be the one dootering aboot pinching every eejit not dawning the emerald green of my country. Tell anyone who tries to give you that thumb and pointer tight grab to feck off because you’ve got St. Patrick’s day boxers on. Wear these gold coin boxers and bounce around like a lil leprechaun who just found his pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Show your love and shoot the craic with your mates in some green and gold chonies. Pick one of these lucky pairs of boxers out just like how you pick the diabetes inducing marshmallows out of a box of Lucky Charms.
Keep Calm and Shamrock On
The most important rule on St. Patty’s day is so simple, but so easily missed. If you do nothing else, just know that you MUST wear green. If you don’t, you are subjecting yourself to drunken ridicule and grabby girls. Good thing we’ve got some green shamrock boxers to save your tender under arm from pinching fiends. Avoid the fingers and find a way to prove that you’ve got on some St. Patrick’s day underwear. Wink wink, nudge nudge.
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