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Red Swimsuits

Red bathing suits solve a lot more problems than you might think. Eating a hot dog and spill ketchup? A red swimsuit will hide that right away. Running by the pool and you fall and break everything? Not to worry, bright red bathing suit here to save the day. Need a third example of why you'd need a red bikini? Go ask your mom. This has been a red bathing suit PSA.

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Red Swimsuits Say Sexy Time Is All The Time  

Red is a symbol of love and passion in cultures all around the world, but in nature, red is a clear indicator of danger. If you’re lucky, you’ll encounter a little bit of both when you slide your baby maker into one of our sexy red swimsuits. Maybe a bright red bikini will turn you into a matador captivating the bull of your choice into a spellbound state, or maybe your red bathing suit will reveal your hidden lifeguard skills, which are basically just attempted mouth to mouth and checking out butts from behind mirrored lenses (like these sweet pit vipers). 

Whether you prefer to live out your lifeguard fantasy in bright red bikinis, simple one piece red bathing suits, or one of our men’s red swimsuits, you’ll experience soft-core swimwear adventures like running down the beach in slow-mo and crashing Baywatch cosplay conventions (as if you needed an excuse). While red is the only color of men’s and women’s swimwear guaranteed not to hassle the Hoff, we are legally obligated to inform you that this bright red swimwear does come with the possibility of being sexually propositioned by Borat.

Planning a vacation? Don't forget your red bikini!

Assuming you’re headed anywhere other than Kazakhstan on your next expedition, do yourself a favor and don’t leave home without at least one of these red swimsuits. The opportunity to say “I’m not a lifeguard, but I did sleep in a Holiday Inn Express last night” is reason enough to throw a couple of bright red bikinis in your bag. Besides, you never know when you might need to jump into action as one of the red spaces in an adults-only game of human Twister, which is the perfect vacation combo of naughty fun and debaucherous danger. So whether your vibe is more of a bright red flag or a sexy red light special, there’s no wrong way to wear these red swimsuits.

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