A lot of people don't know this, but before Santa was Santa...he actually served hard time in the clink. Yep, that's right, Santa was an inmate, and he basically ran the joint. All of the other guys came to him if they were looking for goods from the outside. He had hardcore stock of picante beef ramen, Cuban cigars and plenty of snow.
Santa's time behind bars inspired us to create this unisex Christmas candy cane turtleneck. Wonder why no one has ever caught him coming down the chimney? Well, snitches get stitches. Don't mess with Santa, or you'll get the shiv.