"Money doesn’t grow on trees, and when I was your age, you wouldn’t catch me dead on a scorching Sunday in one of them flat-brim cappers. Fortunately, there's a brim curvier than your mom back when I married her, and you only gotta borrow a few bucks from daddy to snag it. You don’t live in a barn, so protect that glow with a quality hat and get the sun out of your face.
Now let's bring the bush back once and for all."
- That's what my dad texted me when he saw this hat.