A famous carpenter once said, "A man is only as good as his tools.” That famous carpenter went on to create the first beer pong table. That man was Jesus. In his tenure, Jesus created most of the drinking products we use today. Water became wine. A communion cup was rebranded as a shot glass. A canteen, was now a whiskey flask. The cattle whip, a beer belt. A conch, a drinking horn and so on and so forth.Sadly, the creator of these drinking accessories is not here today to witness how far his work influenced drinking games and drinking products. He is with us in spirit. Hence the modern name for hard liquor, sprits.To understand how we got where we are today, it’s important to remember our history. Drinking was not always about “chillin’” or “cracking a cold one open with the boys." Think, during The Dark Beer Ages, medieval serfs were allowed only one oatmeal stout while tending to their lord’s land. Soon, the serfs devised a mechanism to concealed their drinking habits. Enter liquor flasks or feudal freedom flasks as the plebs called them. These whiskey flasks allowed the peasants to “let loose with the fellas” while working the fields. The super dope part is that they still received a lukewarm stout at the end of their shift, which was chill af.Around that same time, Norsemen to the north were carving out antlers to create what we now call the viking drinking horn. They marveled at how quickly they could “pound pints with the bros”. Little did they know, gravity was the reason. Soon, the Norsemen allied with the Danes to create belt buckle beer holders. This device freed their hands allowing them to create fleets that eventually were used to cross the Atlantic.Once overseas (and some years later), Patriots were spreading separatist propaganda with Bud Light shirts and terms like “Dilly Dilly”. They revolted against the British by pouring tea into the harbor and drank "Boston Lagers with the guys” instead. It was an exciting time. These pioneers paved the way for us.A couple hundred years later, two separatists of their own dropped out of law school to create a company with the largest collection of beer shirts and drinking accessories. Only at Shinesty.com.
If you've made it this far in the description, email firstname.lastname@example.org for a discount on your next purchase.