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Da most luscious lettuce in hockey history

Da Shinesty All-Hair Hockey Team

In hockey, a player's net worth is directly related to the legacy of his lettuce. Deez are da most luscious locks in da game.

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(if you aren't already doing so, read dis email aloud with a

Minnesotan / Canadian accent, bub)

So thick it should be called the Sweathog Mullet there, buddy. It was once commanded da most legendary mulletude in da league. So pure, so iconic, so moist.
Hard Hittin' Hair Der

Most will say this is softer than 2-ply, bub. It's no MinneFlowta, but there's nothing wrong aboot a good 'n' greasy combover combined with a sneaky little lip sweater.

Take a look at Da Great here. Just a great, traditional Pantene-Flow-V on one of hockey's all timers. Hard to beat, bub.

A real beaut on an all-time plumber. Dis guy's not afraid to get dirty. Nice lechuga from front to back. No problem here flicking the biscuit around the barnyard.
Tsunami Flow Der

 

How aboot that Mini Truck mullet there, boys? An all-around sweaty look, coupled with maple syrup for a strong hold 'n' shiny finish. No blowdryer needed.

Kane is a real grinder. Always has been. He tacks on a few racing stripes and lets da flow glisten out the back of his fish bowl. Classic.
That's How You Make Da All-Hair Hockey Team

 

 

Get Me In One Of Deez
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Watch for Upper Cuts & Shine On

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