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Dave Kills a Bird Like Randy Johnson

"Dave Killed a Bird."
You gotta love it. Golfing at high noon after about 3 cold ones to warm up when you roll up on the first par 4 of the season. You break out the Play It Again Sports driver your ex-girlfriend got you for your 6-month anniversary and get ready to lay it down to make a name for yourself. Everything is all-systems-go as you tee off over the melody of  afternoon songbirds when the seagull rolls up. Then, you let it rip.

This guy had blood in his eyes from the start, and it's evidence from his aiming point. He opened up to shoulder width, which was textbook, by the way, looked down the highway, and let out a worm burner for the ages.

You can't blame the guy. Every golfer takes aim downfield hoping to tear shit up. Take the teenage summer caddy who rides the range cart at your local country club for example. It's open season as soon as he fires up the raggedy 1986 50cc engine. Everybody takes one last practice swing, shifts their weight to the front foot, and unleash their own gates of hell. Let's not forget the other greats who have dealt death before as well.

Randy Johnson Snipes One in Mid Air
At the climax of his career, during one spring training game against the San Francisco Giants in 2001, Johnson made mince meat of an unsuspecting dove. The bird disappeared, but the deed would be immortalized for years to come. Once Johnson retired from the diamond, he carried the title as a bird killer, which gave him creativity for the logo of Randy Johnson Photography, his profession after baseball. Give it a read here.

Fabio Takes a Goose to the face
In 1999 at Busch Gardens on a ride called "Apollo's Chariot," Fabio took a goose to the face on the roller coaster's first ride. The theme was that from a mythical God, so Busch Gardens sought out Fabio to play the part of the mythical god. Read about here.

Ben Lauderdale
Ben Lauderdale


1 Comment


July 23, 2015

Grip it and rip it, right? Looks like Tweedy got ripped a new one……

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